I turn to you
by SillyLoveStories
Summary: Carolyn died in 1994 as did Tate and her little brother Jason. She's come back to the murder house to find her little brother in the hope of being with him once again. She also hopes that Tate will return the love she had for him when she was still alive but what happens when she learns that there's a twist to her plans?
1. Story Info

Story Info:

American Horror Story Fanfic: I Turn To You

**I don't own the characters but I do own Carolyn, Jason, Yvonne and Jack Lockwood.**

So I decided to write a story based on American Horror Story. (If you haven't watched the show, watch it. It's amazing!) This is only the info but the next chapter will be up tomorrow. (: Now onto the info:

Characters:

-Ben Harmon

-Vivienne Harmon

-Violet Harmon

-Tate Langdon

-Constance Langdon

-Beau Langdon

-Adelaide (Addie) Langdon (deceased)

-Moira

-Hayden

New Characters

Carolyn (Carol/ Care-Bear) Lockwood

Jason (Jay) Lockwood

Yvonne Lockwood

Jack Lockwood

Roles of new characters

Carolyn Lockwood:

Age:17

State: Dead - Ghost

Characteristics: Nice, caring, funny, sarcastic, beautiful

FC: Karen Gillan

Facts

-Is basically a mother for Jason since the age of 13

-Best friend is Tate Langdon

-Is secretly in love with Tate

-Never been sexually abused but has been emotionally abused by father

-Plays piano and guitar and sings

-Loves Jason with all her heart

COD: Suicide

Jason Lockwood:

Age: 11

State: Dead - Ghost

Characteristics: Sweet, caring, funny, loves animal, cute

FC: Haley Joel Osmet (Younger)

Facts:

-Loves Carolyn for raising him since the age of 5 and is very grateful

-Tate is like his older brother

-Addie and Beau are close to him as well

-Physically abused by father

-Plays the guitar and sings

COD: Beaten to death by father

Yvonne Lockwood:

Age: 39

State: Dead

Characteristics: Loving, caring, quiet - until she went into a catatonic state

Facts:

-Mother of Carolyn and Jason

-Loved Carolyn and Jason

-Went into catatonic state since her husband nearly killed her

-Taught Carolyn to sing and play piano

COD: Heart Failure, shocked that both her children were dead

Jack Lockwood:

Age: 40

State: Dead

Characteristics: Alcoholic, abusive

Facts:

-Father of Carolyn and Jason

-"Loves" Carolyn and Jason

-Lost his job and couldn't find another

-Physically abusive towards Jason and Emotionally Abusive towards Carolyn

COD: Suicide


	2. Chapter 1: The before time

Chapter 1: The before time

**I do not own the songs sung, the characters in AHS but I do own Carolyn, Jason, Yvonne and Jack Lockwood. **

"Shh Jason it's okay, it's over, I'm here." I told Jason as I wiped his tears from his face. It hurt me to see him cry, he was just a child after all, why was our dad such a dick head ?Just because he can't find a lousy job he takes it out on Jason.

"Carol, why can't we leave, just you and me?" Jason asked as he sniffled, he hated it here as much as I did. If I could I would leave with Jason but I had other responsibilities that tied me here.

"Jay, I want to leave too, and when we get the chance we will, just hang in there we'll make it." I said as I teared up a little. I hated seeing him like this. He didn't deserve this.

"Why does he do this, I'm sick and tired of this bullshit!" Jason said as he showed me his new bruise on his arm. I was stunned it was the first time I had ever heard Jason swear, he was just an eleven year old and frankly I wasn't about to let him use it again.

"Hey no swearing in front of me Jay, I know you're frustrated but there's no need to use those words." I said as I pulled him back.

"I'm sorry Carol, I know you hate it when I swear but I just, ugh!." Jason sighed as he sat on the bed beside me.

"I know, I'm just as mad as you are but we gotta learn to handle it positively. I mean look at dad, he's mad all the time and look what it causes." I said as I reminded him of his gigantic bruise.

"How can you call him that? He's just Jack to me, he certainly isn't part of my life anymore." Jason said as he furrowed his eyebrows. He was such a cute kid, whenever he did that I couldn't help but smile because it was so funny seeing Jason mad. Seeing his little pout made it even better. During these times I just remember that I had Jason and he had me. That was all that mattered.

"What's so funny?" He asked as his face lightened up a bit.

"Nothing, you just look really funny when you're mad." I said as I stuck my tongue out at him. He laughed a bit and said:

"That's what I love about you Carol, you can make the worst situation into something better without even trying. I-" He was cut off by the sound of a rock being thrown at our window.

"Hold that thought." I said as I went to peer out the window to see what hit it. I saw Tate pointing to the window telling me to unlock it. I smiled and did as I was directed.

"What was it?" Jason said as he stood up.

"Tate, he's coming up." I said as I looked back and gave Jay a smile. His neutral face turned into a grin when he heard Tate was coming. Jason always thought of Tate like a big brother and that made me happy. I mean I couldn't always help Jay with everything he needed a guy along the way at some point.

"Hey there." Tate said as he finished climbing the ladder we had just outside the window.

"Hey Tate." I said as I helped him into the room.

"What's going on? Why are the lights off?" He asked.

"Jack's asleep, when he sleeps we all sleep. New policy." Jason answered before I did.

Tate walked over and sat next to Jay. He pulled him into a hug and noticed that Jay was sore all over.

"What did he do this time?" Tate asked as he looked at Jay with concerned eyes. I loved the fact that Tate was over protective of Jay, just to know someone else was looking out for him.

"He beat me for asking him a question while he was watching Tv." Jason said as he looked down. Tate looked back at me and said;

"That's all? I bet it's all that goddamn alcohol that's getting to him." He stood up and walked over to me and said:

"He didn't hurt you right? Because I swear Carol, he lays one finger on you and-" I cut him off.

"No Tate he didn't, I'm fine, I'm just worried about Jay." I said. Tate sat back down and looked at Jason's bruise.

"Damn what he hit you with, a wreaking ball?" Tate asked.

"No just his fists, I'm lucky he didn't use his belt this time." Jason said as he let out a tear and looked down again.

"Jason listen to me, as long as you have Carol and me, you'll make it through all of this. Don't you dare think, even for a second, that any of this is your fault." Tate said as he carefully wrapped Jason in for a hug.

"Got it Tate, thanks." Jason replied.

"Your turn Care-Bear." Tate said as he patted a seat for me on the bed. I went over and sat down next Jason.

"Come on, you're hiding something, I want to help." Tate said as he smiled warmly. Another one of Tate's characteristics is that he was able to make me melt whenever he flashed that smile.

"Nothing really happened today I guess." I said as scratched the back of my neck.

"Haven't you figured out that I can tell when you're lying Carol?" He said with a little smirk. I looked at him with a quick little grin.

"Jack called her stupid for wasting her time in high school instead of getting a job. He also told her she'd probably make a better living as a prostitute than whatever she wanted to be." Jason replied to Tate. Just remembering what Jack said made me shed a couple of tears.

"Hey now." Tate said. "No tears, I'm here now and I don't wanna see a pretty face crying. That goes for both of you."

Jason and I both smiled as I wiped off my tears. I felt another hand wipe off the last tear on my face when I looked back up it was Tate's warm hand wiping it away.

"I'm pretty sure you got school tomorrow Jay, you should be getting to sleep." Tate said as he looked at Jay.

"You're not gonna leave are you?" He asked Tate. Tate looked at him with a smile and said:

"I'll be here when you wake up Jay."

"Promise?" Jay asked as he held up his pinky. Jason always felt more secure with pinky promises, I never got why but as long as his mind was at peace, I'll continue using pinky promises for the rest of my life if I have to.

"Promise." Tate said as he grabbed Jay's pinky with his own. Jason smiled and got up to get a pair of pjs and went to the bathroom to change.

"Are you sure you're alright?" Tate asked. I knew Tate was being protective and cared for me but I wasn't about to let this whole meeting be about me.

"I'm fine Tate, hey is that a new bracelet?" I said as I pulled up all of his bracelets to see a new scar across his wrist. It hurt me to know that all of us couldn't be happy, even when Tate, Jason and I were together we could never really escape the reality that was just outside the bedroom door. I looked at Tate and hoped he would tell me his reason.

"I know, I'm really trying Carol but it's so hard. I feel like I'm slipping away from everything slowly. The only thing keep me here is you and Jay, you're the last string I can hold on to." He looked down and I saw tears run down his face.

"Hey now," I said as I lifted Tate's head back up. "You said you didn't wanna see any pretty faces cry, I don't either." I smiled as did he. All of a sudden I was being pulled into Tate's arms. I felt so safe, like nothing could ever hurt me or him, like we were in our own little world.

"We're the last people we have in this world, no one else gives a damn. We can't just let it all slip away. Jason and I will be strong for you Tate, just hang on for a bit." I said as I began to tear up. Tate tilted my head up while he kept me in his arms. He wiped away my tears and kissed my forehead. I could feel my heart beating faster and the butterflies flying in my tummy and all the other cliché things that happen in love stories.

"Hey Carol, we're out of toothpaste." Jason said as he walked in on our hug session.

"We are?" I said as I broke from our hug and went to see. Jason was right, we were out of toothpaste. That meant I was going to have to get some from our parent's bathroom. Just for today I'd go for the groceries tomorrow and pick some up.

"I'll just go get some from the other bathroom. Tate keep an eye on Jay." I said as I left the room. I didn't like going into our parents bedroom, not because of Jack he was already passed out on the couch but because of our mother. She would just sit in her rocking chair day after day looking out the window never saying a word. How could she just leave us like this? Jason and I had to fight for our lives and sanity daily while she just let the world go by. Sure she had had a traumatizing experience, but that was was what? 5 years ago? It made me wonder where Jason and I had gotten our courage from, certainly not Jack. He was just a coward, taking it out on us, his children. I remember mom before she was like this. She was full of life and loved to sing to herself. I remember when she began to teach me piano, she made it so easy. It was like I wasn't learning but just going with the music. Letting me drift into a new world, similar to the one I felt with Tate.

"Mom?" Everyday I would come in and see if my mother would ever react. She never did. "I'm just gonna grab some toothpaste okay?" Still nothing. I sighed, grabbed the toothpaste and left. Before I closed the door to see if maybe she would turn her head, give me a sign there was still life in her. I have to start realizing there isn't.

I walked back quietly and walked back into the room to see Jason and Tate looking at a book on birds. Jason loved Animals, whenever he told me new things he found out about them, his face would lighten up. It was one of the strings Jason held onto.

"Okay Jason here you go." I said as I handed him the toothpaste.

"Thanks Carol." Jason took the toothpaste and ran along to brush his teeth.

"Any luck with mommy dearest today?" Tate asked. Tate was the only one who knew I tried to get my mom back into her life everyday. I never told Jason about it because I didn't want to hurt him anymore.

"Nope, I'm starting to lose faith. I've seen her everyday for five years just sitting in that chair only moving when she eats or does her business and nothing. Not even a glance." I don't want to believe my mom won't come back but I guess I have to.

"Don't lose hope, you never know what can happen. Maybe she'll snap back one of these days." Tate said as he stood up and took my hand in his.

"I don't want to but, ugh." I sighed and at that moment Jason came in and laid down.

"Hey, uhm Carol?" Jason asked before he got under the covers.

"Yeah Jay?" I said as I went to sit next to him.

"Can I ask for a favor?" He asked with a small smile.

"Yeah sure, what do you need."

"Can you sing me a lullaby? I know it sounds cheesy for an 11 year old but-" I cut Jason off.

"I'd love to Jay, don't worry about it."

Jason smiled wider and quickly got under the covers. I went to lay next to him as Tate took a seat close to our bed. I thought of the song and started:

"_When all the world is spinning around _

_Like a red balloon way up in the clouds _

_And my feet will not stay on the ground_

_You anchor me back down_

_I am nearly world renowned _

_As a restless soul who always skips town _

_But I look for you to come around_

_And anchor me back down_

_There are those who think that I'm strange_

_They would box me up and tell me to change_

_But you hold me close and softly say_

_That you wouldn't have me any other way_

_When people pin me as a clown_

_You behave as though I'm wearing a crown_

_When I'm lost I feel so very found_

_When you anchor me back down_

_When all the world is spinning around_

_Like a red balloon way up in the clouds _

_And my feet will not stay on the ground_

_You anchor me back down." _

I finished up and noticed that Jason was fast asleep.

"You're really good." I heard a voice whisper next to my ear. It was obviously Tate.

"You think so?" I turned to see Tate's face very close to mine. He was smiling, even in the darkness I could tell.

"I wouldn't be saying it if I didn't mean it." He said with a smirk. "Now you go to sleep you and I both have school tomorrow."

"Will do Langdon." I said with a sarcastic tone. He gave me a kiss on the forehead and I lied back down. I thought about how I was lucky to have Tate and Jason. I probably wouldn't be here without them. They're the reason I keep going everyday. If they ever left me who knows what I'd be reduced to. With the tune still playing in my head and the warmth of the kiss on my forehead I fell fast asleep.

**Song: Anchor by Mindy Gledhill**

**Thank you for reading. I'm really into this story and I'm really excited for it. I hope you liked the first chapter. My finals will be over soon so I'll be posting frequently. (: **

Maybe one day we'll find the place where our dreams and reality collide


	3. Chapter 2: I'll Follow you into the dark

Chapter 2: I'll follow you into the dark

**I do not own the characters in AHS but I do own Carolyn, Jason, Yvonne and Jack Lockwood. **

**Chapter title is the name of the song used in this chapter by Death Cab for Cutie. I don't own that either. **

"Tate, where is he?" I questioned as I got home, to find Tate, his face stained with tears. I knew something was wrong, I couldn't find Jason anywhere in the house and this made it worse.

"Carol, you need to calm down." Tate said as he tried to sit me down on the couch. I was really scared, my anxiety level was getting higher by the second. I felt as if I was being choked by someone even though it was just me and Tate in the living room.

"What do you mean calm down? Tate where's Jason?" What ever Tate was doing it wasn't funny.

"I need to tell you something and I know it's not going to be easy for you, hell, it wasn't easy for me." Tate said as he began to cry a bit more.

"Tate, what happened? Tell me!" I screamed. I needed to know where Jason was.

"Jason's dead."

"No, no you're lying. Jason can't be dead." I stood up and ran all over the house. I felt hot tears falling from my face.

"Jason! Jason come on! This isn't funny! Come out from you're hiding spot." By this point my face was covered by my tears. I ran into our room and opened the closet, looked under the bed I looked everywhere but no Jason.

"Jay! Stop it! You can't be dead!" I screamed at the top of my lungs. I fell on the ground and began to cry harder. I felt Tate's arms around me but I felt numb. Like something was ripped out of me.

"Jason can't be dead, he had dreams. H-he wanted to see the world. He was so innocent. Tate he CAN'T be dead." He can't." I buried my face into the ground and cried as hard as I could. It wasn't fair, I was supposed to look after him, how could I have let this happen?

"Tate," I said through my tears. "What happened?"

"Your dad got home really drunk and Jason was in the living room reading. He just got so angry, I don't know what got into him, the next thing I knew Jason was on the floor, knocked out. There was blood and bruises everyone on him." As Tate told me what had happened I got angry. But then it hit me, the body.

"Tate, where's Jason's body?" I asked as I sat up, tears still falling on my face. I wanted to see Jason even if he was dead. It would be the last glimpse I would have of him. Tate rubbed his eyes, sniffled a bit and he continued:

"Your dad, he took him somewhere. He hasn't come back." Tate said as more tears fell.

At that moment, I heard the door open, from downstairs.

"Tate hide." I told Tate as soon as I heard the noise.

"Carol, I'm not leaving you alone with that murderer!" Tate said as he moved closer to me.

"I need you to, please. I can't have Jack kill you too." Tate looked at me sternly, there was no way I was going to get him to hide. "Just until he passes out, then we'll see what happens." I didn't need anything happening to Tate. I wouldn't be able to cope.

"Alright but I'm staying in the house. No buts." He said, I stood up and went downstairs slowly. My legs felt like jello, I was scared of him, it was intense. I was more than just scared, I was angry. I wanted to kill him but I couldn't bring myself to do it. There he was just lying on the sofa with an empty bottle.

"Hey, there you are, go get me another one of these." Jack reeked of alcohol, when didn't he. I just stood there, gaining the courage to tell him off. I wasn't going to do what he asked not this time, not ever.

"What if I don't? Will you hurt me like you did with Jason?" I asked as more tears formed but I wiped them off.

"What the hell are you talking about? Just get me a damn drink." He said. He was getting mad and that's what I wanted.

"No, I'm not going to get you a drink. Is that why you beat Jason today? He wasn't good enough for you or something? Or were you just coping with the fact that you're a heartless asshole who can't get a damn job!" I screamed at him. I was tired of him treating us like this, he couldn't just get away with it.

"Why are you raising your voice at me huh? Hasn't your mother taught you any respect? " He stood up and got closer to me, I was ready for whatever card he had to throw at me. "I'll get my drink myself." He walked past me, I turned and said:

"Hey! I'm not done talking to you."

"What else do you have to say? Some other stupid remark, now where's that other kid Johnny or whatever? He's in for another one because of you." He said as he reached in the fridge.

"You don't remember, you killed him! You beat him too damn hard, what are you gonna use as a punching bag now? It's like you don't even know who we are anymore. He was your son and you abused him. What does that say about you? You're a coward, a heartless bastard. You're worthless. Look at yourself you drink day after day trying to make the pain go away but all it does is make it worse. You never had the guts to confront any of this! Do you even remember who I am? I'm your daughter, you used to care for me, you loved me! Ever since you started drinking you forgot all of that! I hope your fucking happy. You destroyed everything, your wife, your son, me, your entire life is ruined all because of a damn drink." I spat at him and left him there, his mouth shut tight. Not a word was said. As I walked back upstairs I heard him leave the house. Good riddance

"Tate?" I said as got in the room. My eyes burned from crying, it seemed like the only thing I could do to make them feel better was cry some more. I stood there in the middle of the room my arms around my waist. I saw Tate in front of me.

"Come on." He said as he took one of my hands.

"Where are we going?" I asked. I didn't want to leave but something about the thought of leaving was intriguing.

"You can't stay in this house, it won't help you. Especially with what just happened." Tate opened the window and climb out, I did the same. We walked over to his house, I never had a good feeling about the house, it had a reputation and I just knew that it managed to give anyone who lived in the house one too, once they died at least.

We began walking up the stairs to Tate's room, the only place that felt okay.

"Carolyn!" I heard a shrill voice and knew that Constance was standing by the stairwell.

"Hi." I said as I turned, I saw Tate get a little annoyed by the old woman. I didn't like Constance but I didn't hate her with a burning passion like Tate. I was neutral but one thing was certain. I didn't trust her.

"What are you doing here, something wrong sweat pea?" She sounded condescending -like. I knew Constance liked me but she probably didn't trust me either.

"I just came over for a visit that's all." I said as I wiped my nose. Most days I was firmer with her, I stood on my ground but today, I could barely get up.

"Well if you need anything let me know." She left to the kitchen and we headed straight to Tate's room. Nothing was right, I felt so uncomfortable being anywhere that Jason was once. Just knowing that a care free Jason ran around here with a smile on his face and not a care in the world. It just wasn't right.

"Come here." Tate said as he sat on the bed, patting a spot next to him. I walked over slowly. The only thing that repeated in my head was '_Nothing's right_'

"Why him Tate? Why did Jason have to die? It seems so cliche to say but if anyone deserved what Jason went through it was me. How did I let Jack beat on him everyday?" I cried harder through my words. It just wasn't fair.

"No one deserved what Jason went through, you especially didn't deserve it. You're kind and sweet, not too mention lovely." I blushed a bit but not even that could help me. "Right now you need to lie down, you need to sleep, okay?" Tate lied down and I lied next him. My face and hands on his chest.

"You'll be here when I wake up right?" I looked up at Tate as he nodded. "Promise?" I said as I held up my pinky. Tate shed a tear as he grabbed my pinky with his. I laid my head next to his chest and fell asleep.

I woke up and saw Tate next to me, he looked down at me and wrapped his arms around me. A tight hug, I needed Tate right now and no one is going to take me away from him.

"Are you going to school?" He asked, I honestly didn't feel like doing anything, my head was pounding, there was no way I was going to be able to focus.

"No, I'm just gonna go home." I got up and just as I was about to stand, he held me back.

"Carol, you need to tell me you won't do anything stupid while you're over there alone, okay?" He looked at me and the look he gave off just told me to stay away from anything that could harm me or else.

"I won't , I promise." I grabbed his pinky and left. All I wanted was to sleep, just sleep. Not die or anything but I was wanted that peaceful state, because maybe I'd see Jason in my dreams it was a long shot but maybe I might see him. That's all I want

I stayed home all day only getting up to drink water and the occasional trip to the bathroom. It was around 8:30pm when I decided to see Tate. Jack wasn't home, nothing of his was at the house anymore. Only mom remains at home but one way or another she'll snap now.

I knocked on the front door of Tate's house, I found a tear stained face and to my surprise it was Constance.

"Hi Mrs. Langdon, may I come in?" I asked, something else was wrong, Constance never cried in front of anyone. I could tell that meant seeing her weak side. In that way I was similar to Constance but I would never want any other one of her characteristics.

"He's not here dear, he's not coming back." She said with a weak voice.

"What do you mean? Where did he go?" I was getting worried. Tate not coming back? He had to come back. Where else would he go?

"He left this for you." Constance handed me a letter and continued: "Darling, didn't you hear the sirens?"

"What sirens? I was sleeping all day, what happened?" I swear if Tate left me alone, I'm going to flip.

"Carolyn, he's dead." Her words hit me like swords piercing every part of me. She's lying, he can't be dead.

"You're lying, Tate's not dead. He just can't be, he was here this morning he was leaving for school!" I shouted.

"Carolyn you have to c-."

"NO! I won't calm down, my best friend is dead and you're telling me to calm down?" I was shaking, this wasn't happening. First Jason and now Tate! I ran back home with tears running down my face once again. I got inside and broke down, stood in the kitchen with tears pouring from my eyes. How could he leave me like this? Why was he being so selfish? I remembered the letter Constance gave me. What did this coward have to tell me?

_Carolyn, _

_If you're reading this then you know about what has happened. I didn't want any of this but you and Jason were the last string I had. When I saw Jason dead it was one string that was cut off. I didn't want anymore of this, I know it seems as if I left you, I did it as cowardly as your father did. I didn't want to hurt you, I need you to know that. So to protect you this has happened. Promise me you won' t do anything stupid. You deserve a good life, filled with happiness, not pain. _

_- Tate _

Protect me? From what? I needed Tate and now he isn't here. I can't keep my promise anymore. The only people I had in my life are gone. I'm all alone. It's a sudden feeling to know you're alone, like quick sand. It's just something that hits you.

I walked to the counter there right before my eyes was my way out. A cold chef knife, I grabbed it but I didn't want to finish what I had started. It was too late my mind had pushed me over the edge repeating _'Nothing's fine' _I had had enough of pain, enough of feeling alone. Life's a nightmare and it was time to end it. I slashed my arms vertically with no mercy. And just like that, it was finally over.

**Thank you for reading! I need some help guys so reviews would be lovely. I hope you guys like how it's going I'm trying my best. More chapters to come (: **


	4. Chapter 3: The after time

Chapter 3: The after time

I put up the link of the outfit that Carolyn wears on my profile info if you want to see it (:

Mood music song is Cosmic Love by Florence and The Machine : I don't own the song.

Dead, I was dead. It took me 16 years to find out every detail about what happened after I died, what happened to my so called father and mother. I also found out why I had no idea who I was. My mother snapped back when she came down for dinner, She died after my funeral, from some type of heart attack. As for my dad he committed suicide after he left the house that night. I had no idea who I was because I was buried in a grave yard, apparently I have unfinished business. I thought that kinda stuff only happened in movies I guess not. Oh, the reason why it took me so long to find out who I was? Well when you're buried in a grave yard it's like it erases everything, who you were, what you did, any thought you ever had is completely gone. The only thing I knew was my name that was written on the head stone. Now what I had to was to find my unfinished business. I walked out of the grave yard for the first time in 16 years and headed down a familiar street.

"Carolyn?" I heard what seemed like a familiar shrill voice. I turned my head and saw a woman. I'd seen her before but where, I knew a few details but not much.

"Is that you?" She said as she walked closer to where I was. "It is!" She smiled, I didn't know what to say.

"Carolyn are you alright?" Her face dropped.

"Sorry but who are you? You seem familiar but I can't put a name to a face at the moment." I honestly felt like if I found out who she was I might find out more about myself.

"Come inside dear." She said as she pulled on my wrist. This house gave off vibes, I know something happened here, it might have been where Jason died. We walked into the kitchen and I felt a massive pounding in my head.

"Carolyn this is Billie, she'll help you with your memory problem." I heard faintly over my headache. I sat down but I still felt funny. Then all of a sudden it was like I was being sucked through a straw and back to the kitchen where I was. I remembered everything. It sounds weird, walking into a room, sitting down and remembering everything but it happened.

"Constance?" I remembered the woman sitting across from me, Billie was gone. Strange but I thought nothing of it.

"Carolyn! You remember!" She smiled and clapped her hands. I didn't understand why she was happy about me being here or remembering everything. I was tempted to ask but I didn't.

"You're as pretty as I remember dear." She said, I couldn't tell what she wanted from me. She never called me pretty when I was alive. To be honest I felt judged by her, I guess even before Constance I had never felt pretty in anyone's presence.

"Constance, is there something you want from me? Or something I should know? You never seemed to be this way before I died."

"I'm sorry, I guess I'm just happy you're here. Things have changed so much since that incident." Her body shook, like she had gotten a chill.

"It has I mean didn't you live in the other house, I remember this was my house. I died right over there." I pointed to the counter, it seemed like a dream. I had wrapped my head around the fact I was dead a while ago but it just seemed so unreal.

"I remember that day, I was the one who found you. I was scared for you so I decided to see if you kept your promise to Tate, but I guess you didn't." She said as she stood up with a stern look on her face.

"Wait you read the letter?" I asked as I stood up. She read what Tate had written me?

"Of course I did, I knew about what happened with Jason and with what happened to Tate? I just wanted to make sure you were safe." She said quietly.

"You didn't change anything in the letter did you?"

"No I didn't I just read it." She came back with a cup of tea and set it in front of me. "Carolyn do you know where Jason's body was ever buried?"

"No, Tate said that Jack had taken it with him." I said as I took a sip of the tea.

"Oh dear, so he never -." She stopped, it seemed as though she were hiding something from me.

"Constance? He never what?"

"Never mind that, do you have anyone to stay with dear?" She asked as she reached to take my hands in hers. She wanted something and I want to know what it is.

"Constance, you want something. I need to know what it is." I said avoiding the recent subject brought up. She looked down and shook her head.

"I want Tate to be happy, a new-" I cut her off.

"Tate? Tate's dead Constance what are you talking about?"

"Carolyn, when you were alive and you went to our house, did you ever see any people? People you didn't know?" Constance gave me a concerned look.

"No, was I supposed to?"

"It was better that you didn't but there are things you don't understand about said house. It's evil, trapped souls every where you turn and that's what has happened to Tate." She sat back and let everything sink in.

"Wait, I don't understand, w-" This time she cut me off.

"Tate died but his soul remains in the house. It looks as though he were alive and in some form he is." She smiled at the thought of it.

"Well what's the problem then?"

"A new family has moved in, a girl has stolen his fragile heart. With you here, he can return to you and not get hurt by that other one. I don't want to see him sad or broken. You can fix that, you always had that gift with him. One gift I did not."

The thought of Tate loving another girl broke my heart. I had always loved Tate ever since the moment I met him. Another girl? A million questions buzzed through my mind. Who was she? What did she look like? Was she dead too? Was there anything I could really do?

"You want me to just go over there? I can't do that, I'm not known for my out going- ness."

"I'll help you, see I've baked this for the family and I was planning on giving it to them but since you're here you can do it. It'll give you a chance to meet the family and see the girl who has him." She showed me the bread she had made for them but I felt wrong about doing this.

"Constance, I have to tell you, I'm only here to find Jason and something tells me that that house has something to with it."

"You'll be able to do both trust me." Trust. One thing I could never do but at this point what did I have to lose? I needed to find Jason and this might be my ticket to finding him. I closed my eyes, breathed out and said:

"Alright, I'll do it, but just so we're clear, I'm doing this for Jason and partially for Tate. If my mind changes I might be doing this for you to." Constance pulled me into a hug that I was not ready for.

"Thank you." She said faintly, she pulled away and said: "So do you need somewhere to sleep? I have a bed, it's clean and oh well come on I'll show you."

Constance showed me to my "room" for now. I wasn't quite comfortable staying with her but it's gotta be done. After Constance left I laid down and thought about everything I had heard, everything I was going to do. I thought about Jason, I missed him dearly and knowing that I might see him again made a smile appear on my face. I thought about Tate and this girl. I wondered about her, with every thought I got more insecure of myself. I ended falling asleep with the smile on my face, it was the first time I had dreamt of Jason.

I woke up to see the sun shining in my face, it felt nice. Something about it made me feel more alive than dead.

"Knock knock." I head a voice say from outside my room. "May I come in?"

"Come in Constance." I said as I remembered why I was here. Constance walked in with some boxes.

"What's that?" I asked as I got up and walked towards her.

"Well when you died I collected some of your things, hoping maybe some day Tate would find them in the basement and remember but he didn't."

"You kept my stuff next door? How did you even get in there?" I was a bit confused on the subject.

"Well am I going to answer your questions or are you going to pick what you want to wear to meet the Harmon's?" She put her hands on her hips. I leaned down and opened the box. I remember all of my clothes, shirts, pants, shorts, skirts. It made me happy to see them it reminded me of when I had all that I needed.

"I knew you'd be happy to see this." She said as she sat on the edge of the bed.

"I'm very happy, I just can't believe I'm seeing all of this again." I smiled as I took out my things. Constance stood up and said:

"Well go freshen up and you can go over, they should be up and running by now." She walked out of the room. As soon as she left I jumped all around. I was happy just to see the clothes that reminded me of the times I spent with Jason and Tate. I went to shower and put on my favorite outfit; skinny jeans, a fancy top with a tank top underneath and my white converse. It made me feel at home. I had a chance and I wan't going to mess it up.

I walked downstairs to find Constance reading the paper eating her brunch. She looked up and smiled.

"Look at you! You look beautiful, the glow on your face makes you seem alive." I smiled slightly because I wasn't going to trust Constance just yet.

"Thank you. So what's the plan?" I asked as I sat down.

"Simple, you'll go over with the cake and Vivienne will answer, you'll greet her and tell her you've moved in with me and this is just a little something you made to great them. Make conversation, but don't look for Tate just yet, it'll take some getting used to for him, he's sensitive. You already know that." She took a sip of her drink and kept reading.

"Should I go now then?"

"Go whenever you feel like you're ready." She smiled at me. I got up and I was about to take the cake when I remembered a very important question.

"Constance?" I turned to face her. "What did happen to Tate that day? The day I died?"

Constance set her cup down slowly and said:

"That day, Tate was very upset, he couldn't control what was coming. He went to school but with a different objective other than learning, he was going to take his anger out."

"Take his anger out? On who?"

"He never did like anyone at school, except for you of course." She stood up and walked towards me. "Carolyn it wasn't easy for me to understand what he had done, so you can't run off like you did that night." What did Tate do? How could what he had done be the cause of his death?

"Carolyn he went to school that day and shot down 15 of his classmates, injured many more." Constance looked down and walked back to her seat. I couldn't believe what she had just told me, Tate couldn't have done that. He just couldn't, it wasn't like him. I knew Tate and whoever killed those kids at our high school was not Tate.

"I think I'm gonna go over now." I said as I took the cake and left. I knew it probably wasn't a good idea since I had new information to deal with but it didn't matter to me. It mattered in way but I needed to go through with Constance's plan. I walked up to the house, I remembered Constance's words, about how the house was evil. It sure gave off an evil vibe. I knocked on the door and a woman opened it. She was pregnant from what I could tell, she was taller than I was and was very pretty. In a way she reminded me of my mother.

"Hi, how can I help you?" She said.

"Oh hi, I just moved in next door and I came with this cake, you know just to be friendly." I had never really done this before, mainly because when I was alive I had lived in Constance's house since I was seven, so she was the one who greeted us.

"Oh well that's funny, I haven't seen any house's around here for sale."

"They weren't I just moved in with Constance, she's an old friend of my family." This was the only excuse I could think of.

"Oh really, well come on in, you must have had enough of her for one day. I'm Vivienne." She let me and when I walked through the door a rush of memories came to me, seeing everything around me had some distant memory except for the new furniture and such.

"Well she isn't the best company to have but she's kind of the last thing I have left." She led me to the kitchen and we sat down.

"What about your parents? Where are they?" She asked as she got a knife to cut the cake Constance had made.

"My parent's are dead, they died a while ago." More like 16 years ago. "That's why I came to live here with Constance." It didn't hurt me as much as I thought, remembering my parents I mean. They were basically never there. What did hurt was remembering Jason.

"Oh I'm so sorry." She gave me a very sorry look, I knew she meant it.

"It's alright, they were never really there for me anyways. I'm just hoping I'll see my brother." I said as I looked at my hands.

"Where's your brother?" I just realized what I had said, how did I let that slip?

"It's a long really complicated story." I said as I looked back up. At that moment I heard footsteps from behind me.

"Oh Violet I'm glad you're here, I want you to meet, Oh sorry I don't believe I caught your name." Vivienne said.

"Carolyn." I responded as I turned to see a young girl around my age maybe younger. So this was Violet. She sure was pretty. She was thin, with medium long dirty blonde hair, I can honestly say her skin was flawless. I guess I know why Tate was attracted to her. I needed to forget all of that, the only reason I was still here was to find Jason. I had to put my emotions, my insecurities, what I wanted aside, I needed to replace all of that for finding my brother. That's all that mattered.

**Thank you for reading! I really love how this is going so I'm going to update a lot. Just so you guys know when Carolyn was alive she lived in the house Constance lives in, the one next door. Tate lived in the murder house. Sorry about the confusion. Anyways send me some ideas I might use 'em. I love you all!**


	5. Chapter 4: Don't walk away

Chapter 4: Don't walk away and leave my in the dark

Mood music: Don't walk away - Joshua Staar (I don't own the song)

So this was Violet. The girl who had "stolen Tate's fragile heart" as Constance put it. I was nervous in front of her, but I couldn't let her see it. She seemed nice enough but looks are deceiving.

"Violet this is Carolyn." Vivienne said as she broke me from my train of thought. "She just moved in next door with Constance."

"Oh harsh." She said as she took a seat next to me. "How's she been treating ya?"

"Well I'm alive aren't I?" Lie. Violet let out a small laugh and said:

"Finally somebody my age has moved in around here. I've been getting lonely. How old are you anyways?"

"I'm seventeen, you?"

"Fifteen but it's better than nothing." Vivienne had left the room so we could chat, I didn't mind.

"That's true, I never liked feeling alone. It never helps my sanity." I said with a smirk.

"So why are you living with Constance? Are you related to her or something?" She said as she grabbed an apple from the bowl in front of us.

"No I'm not, I'm living with her because I'm alone. She's kind of the last person I have anywhere." I said as I looked around, everything was different, but in a way it was the same.

"Alone? What about your family? friends?" She said as she bit into the apple.

"My parents died, I barely had any friends, except for this one guy." I said as I looked at my sneakers.

"Oh a guy? Any chance you'll tell me more?" She said as nudged her elbow on my arm. I smiled and said:

"I don't see why not." I really had nothing to lose by telling her. As long as I didn't mention Tate's name, I was fine.

"So-" She cut me off before I began.

"Hold on, lets go up to my room. I bet you anything my mom's gonna listen in." She said as she grabbed my arm and began walking up the stairs with me. We walked into her room, the first thing I noticed was that this was Tate's old room. The room where I slept the night Jason had died. The room where I woke up to find a perfectly normal Tate who ended up killing 15 kids and somehow died. It hurt me to be back.

"You okay?" Violet asked as she went over to her pile of CDs.

"Yeah, I'm good just a bit cold but don't worry about it." I said as I walked around. It was dark, just the way Tate liked it.

"You like the Ramones?" She said as she lifted a CD cover.

"You kidding me? They're great." I smiled, at least Violet had a good taste in music. She put the music on and sat down on the bed, she hit the bed a sign to tell me to sit. Another thing to remind me of Tate. Just great.

"So this guy, was he your boyfriend or something? Or we're you guys just friends?" She said as she sat crossed legged.

"No, he wasn't my boyfriend, but damn I wished he was. He was warm, sweet, funny, he was kind of what I needed at the time. I was emotionally abused by my dad and he was always there for me. I don't know if that was the only reason I was attracted to him but I settled with being friends. I didn't want to ruin anything."

"Why would it've been ruined? Were you afraid of him not liking you back?"

"Yeah, in a way. I mean I was a lot to handle at them time. I was an emotional wreak, everyday there was something that made me want to cry my eyes out. Everyday he'd come over and I'd tell him what had happened. Whenever he was around it was like we were in our own little world but even then he was untouchable."

Violet nodded and then asked:

"So what happened to him?"

"He went a little crazy, he didn't have the best family either. I still loved him though, but when my parents died, I couldn't take it so I left." We talked in the room for so long but it was really interesting. Not only was Violet pretty, she had a different point of view on a lot of things. As time went by, it grew darker, the sun was going down but it was another kind of dark. Like something in the room was taking in all of our light. I didn't know what it was but I could feel it.

"It's getting dark, do you think Constance would mind you staying longer?" Violet asked as she noticed it getting darker.

"I'm not too sure, she hasn't shown her strict side yet so maybe I'll stay a bit longer, if that's okay with you." I really hoped it was because an idea had been planted in my head and now I had to follow through with it.

"It's fine with me." She said as got up off the bed.

"So, I've heard a lot about this house and I was wondering if maybe you could give me a little tour." If this house had anything to do with Jason's death I was going to find out today.

"Yeah why not, let's go." She smiled and we both walked out of the room, When we got into the hallway it felt brighter, not like inside. We went to the obvious places in the house, living room, kitchen every place that I had already seen. That's when we got to the main attraction -at least for me- the basement.

"Can you just hold on a sec, I forgot something in my room. I'll be back." Violet said as we sprinted to her room. I didn't mind, I needed to find Jason and with Violet with me it wouldn't be easy. I walked into the basement, remembering it as the first time Tate took me and Jason down here. He tried to scare us which he did successfully. I looked around for a clue, something that I might have found that pointed me in the right direction to find Jason.

"Violet?" A voice said from the other end of the room. It was familiar, too familiar. It was Tate. I turned the corner as fast as I could, Constance had told me not to show myself to Tate if I found him. I wasn't ready to see him any how.

"Violet you down here?" I could feel him getting closer, that made me uneasy. After everything that had happened, what I was too blind to see, and what Constance had told me about what Tate had done, I was afraid of him. I was afraid of my best friend. I heard him walk closer, he was probably on the other side of the wall. My dead heart stopped. He was bound to see me now.

"Tate?" I heard a voice at the top of the staircase. It was Violet. This was going to get worse. He walked over to the staircase.

"I thought you were upstairs, what are you doing down here?" I turned my head just a bit to see what was going on, it was a risk but I was willing to take it.

"I just went to see if you were there, I'll meet up with you later. We have a new neighbor and she's around my age, I'm showing her around. I think we'll be pretty good friends. Anyways I'm giving her a tour, she's probably down here so just go up to my room."Violet explained in brief detail. My question was did Tate just like her or were they together? In both cases I knew I would be torn to pieces.

"Alright." He said as he kissed her forehead and vanished. With that my dead little heart was ripped to pieces. He had kissed my forehead the last night I had with Jason. Those lips belonged to me. He belonged to me. He'd left me alone in the dark once, how could he be so heartless and do it again! I didn't care if he didn't know I was here, he just couldn't walk away from me like that. He just couldn't. I began to tear up, my hand covered my mouth as I looked away and closed my eyes. It hurt me to know that I was stuck in the middle, I loved Tate but then there was Violet who probably loved him too. I followed his trace down here, his dark pull only so he could leave me in the dark and walk away.

"Carolyn?" Violet said breaking me out of my dark thoughts. I wiped my eyes and came out from behind the wall.

"Oh hey Violet, sorry I went down here, I guess curiosity got the best of me." I said as walked up to her.

"No problem, did you look around?" She asked, it was too dark for her to notice that I had been crying, thankfully.

"Yeah I did b-" I stopped talking as soon as I noticed a book sitting on top of a few boxes. It was about birds, it was the book Jason was showing Tate the last night I had him with me.

"You okay?" She said, I couldn't look away but I managed to say:

"I'm good, do you mind if I take a look at that book over there?" I said as I walked towards it. It felt as though I was gliding over.

"Go for it, it's not ours, I guess it was just left down here with some other things. If you want you can keep it." Violet had no idea how much it meant to me to have this book. I had to be strong at least until I got back to Constance.

"You sure?" I said as I picked the book up and looked at her.

"Yeah it's no problem, wouldn't be doing us any harm." I smiled and took the book into my arms.

"Thanks so much." I replied.

"You a fan of birds?" She smiled back as we walked up the stairs.

"Yeah, a really big fan, I've always loved them." I lied about that too but what other choice did I have?

"That book's pretty big so you should know a lot about them by the time you finish." She said as we got to the top.

"Thanks again for the book, I guess I should get going before Constance really does flip out." I was a little nervous about what would happen once I got back but it didn't matter, this book had given me back my faith in finding Jason.

"Well then I guess I'll be seeing you around?" Violet said as her smiled drooped a bit.

"We'll be seeing a lot of each other Violet, don't worry about it." I smiled, Violet's face lightened up and she opened the door for me. We said out goodbyes and I walked out of the house with the book wrapped in my arms. I knocked on the door and there was Constance in her night gown, she seemed content to see me.

"Come in dear, tell me everything." She ushered me in and soon enough she had me sitting down with a cup of tea in front of me.

"How did it go? Did you find everything okay?" She was really eager to know. I would be too.

"For the most part it was good. I made friends with Violet, Vivienne seems to like me I think." I didn't want to think about my whole visit remembering what I had seen with Tate. It felt like an old scar being opened up.

"You say for the most part, what went wrong?" She looked at me like she actually cared.

"I saw Tate." I said as I sipped my tea, hopefully it would calm me down. The chances of that happening were very low.

"He didn't see you did he?" Her eyes grew wider.

"No he didn't , I saw him he didn't see me." I didn't want to continue but I knew Constance would make me say it one way or another. "He was in the basement, I could feel him, that's when Violet came downstairs. She spoke to him and told him to go upstairs, that they would talk later." I paused for a minute or two and continued.

"He kissed her forehead, just like he kissed mine." I let a tear fall, I knew Constance would see my weakness but it didn't matter to me.

"Carolyn don't worry about that." She took my hand into hers and continued: "In a few days he'll be kissing your forehead, just like before, give it some time. What have you got there?" She said as she noticed the book I had brought with me.

"Oh, well I found it in the basement, it's Jason's old book. Violet told me I could keep it." I said as I looked back up. My nose was red from what I could tell.

"He always did have quite a fascination with animals." She said smiling as she looked at the book.

"Constance?" I looked at her and continued: "Do you think, that the house has Jason? I know his body isn't there but could there be the chance that he is?"

"Carolyn, when you finally get the chance, ask Tate he'll know and he'll certainly tell you." Something about what she said gave me more hope, Constance wouldn't say something like that to anyone in a fragile state, unless she hated them with passion.

"I think I might go to bed, my eyes hurt from crying." I said as I stood up.

"Goodnight Carolyn, sleep well." Her hand waved at me and I walked up the stairs. I was eager to look inside the book. I felt like I had taken part of Jason with me. If I ever do find Jason I'll give him this again. I sat on my temporary bed reading each page. When I read the did you know facts on the edge of the page all I could hear was Jason's voice. It was like he was right next me me, but I knew he wasn't. One can dream though. I remembered when Jason first got it, I had given it to him on his birthday. I remembered how his face light up, his smile made me the most happy. To see his genuine happiness. I had probably stained every page in the book with my tears,but it didn't matter. I was hopeful that I could and will find him. Everything points to it. I wasn't going to be left in the dark again, if anything that was the last thing that would happen. No one, not even Tate, can hurt me enough to stop me from finding Jason. Even if Tate was my best friend, I was going to have to forget him for the sake of me, Jason and my sanity.

Hey guys, thanks for reading. My last exam is tomorrow then I'm home free! Keep my in your prayers I need them badly. I hope you like how the story is going, send me some ideas guys, you never know what can inspire a writer. (: I love you all, more chapters to come!


	6. Chapter 5: I missed you

Chapter 5: I found you scared and alone

Mood music: You found me -The Fray or Anchor - Mindy Gledhill

"_Here you go Jason, happy birthday." Jason unwrapped the present as soon he had it in his hands. _

"_What is it?" He said as he continued to rip the wrapping paper off. _

"_Open it and you'll see!" I smiled as I watched his smile got wider. _

"_It's the book! The one from the store! " He couldn't believe it, the book he wanted so much was in his hands. He had been saving his money up for it but now he didn't have to. Jason jumped up and tackled me to the ground. He wouldn't let go for about 5 minutes. _

"_Carol, you're amazing. Thank you." Jason said as he helped me back up. _

_CRASH_

I woke up to the sound of a bottle crashing downstairs. I shivered a bit as I remembered those noises from years ago. I got up slowly and went to see what was going on. It was obviously Constance, the thing was it was a little to early for her to be drinking. I walked down stairs and found her leaving the house. The back door slammed and there was glass shattered all over the floor. I went to go pick it up, what could have possibly made Constance that angry? As I finished I hear a knock on the door, I was only in my pjs but I decided to open it anyways.

"Hello Carolyn." It was Billie, Constance's psychic or whatever the hell she was.

"Hi, Constance isn't here right now b-" She cut me off.

"I'm not here to see Constance, I'm here to talk to you." She had a worried look on her face.

"Well I'm still in my pjs but-" Once again she cut me off.

"It doesn't matter, I need to talk to you even if it's only for a couple of minutes."

"What's going on? Does it have to do with Jason?"

"No, it has to do with that house. It doesn't tolerate you, tell me do you get a strange feeling whenever you enter it?" I thought of my recent visit to the murder house and all that happened. To a degree I did feel strange, I always did.

"Yeah I do but what does it have to do with the house?"

"The house can't stand you, it's like you're in it's way. The way I see it is the house has this pulling darkness and to the house you're like this light that breaks through the pulling. I don't know how and to be honest with you that shouldn't be happening."

"Well, I'm still allowed to go in right?"

"Yes you can and to be honest you should go today, I walked past it and sensed something inside the house, as if it were yearning for you, just one more thing. Ignore anything Constance has told you. If you want to find Jason listen to me." With that Bille left. I felt something inside me jump telling me to hurry up and leave. I scurried along to shower and do all the womanly things we woman do, I left with the intention to see Violet. I was glad I befriended her but something also told me that I shouldn't get to attached. I knocked on the door and saw a man, probably Violet's dad.

"Hello, how can I help you?" He said

"Hi, I'm here to see Violet. I'm your new neighbor, I met Violet and Vivienne yesterday."

"Oh I'm sorry I didn't get a chance to introduce myself, I'm Ben Harmon come on in." He let me in and we both shook hands.

"Violet's upstairs in her room, you can tell by the music." He walked away and went to answer his phone. I walked up the stairs.

I would never be able to shake this strange feeling that Bille had reminded me of. Even before I died, Jason knew it too. As I walked up I heard something above me, like a ball rolling. I looked up to see the entrance to the attic, it couldn't be, no it can't be Beau. I continued walking when I heard the ball roll again. Curiosity got the best of me, I made sure no one was around and I opened it and there was the ladder before me. I walked up, it sure was dusty. I looked around, quietly, to my surprise a red ball rolled against my feet. I rolled it back in the direction that it came from and sure enough there was Beau. He was smiling.

"Carol?" He asked.

"Yeah Beau it's me, Carol." I bent down and sat with him. I was a little teary, Beau was so innocent, like Jason, why was he trapped in this hell hole? These things angered me. He wasn't supposed to be here, no child belonged here. Not even Tate.

"Play with Beau?" He gently rolled the ball over to me. I thought of Violet, but then again she doesn't know I'm here, a few rolls wouldn't hurt.

"Yes but only for a little while okay?" I smiled as I rolled the ball back. We rolled the ball over and over for about ten minutes, as much as I loved being here with Beau I had to go see Violet.

"Beau, I have to go okay?" I said as I picked the ball up and handed it to him. I gave him a hug and he hugged me back. I hadn't seen Beau in so long, saying goodbye hurt me. I could tell it hurt him as well. As I walked down the ladder Beau spoke up:

"Carol?"

I looked up and responded:

"Yes Beau?"

"Jason likes to play with me too, he plays everyday." With that Beau vanished. Jason plays with Beau? I started to wonder, what did he mean? Was he giving me a hint? What about Constance? She said I'd be able to be with Tate and Jason, they knew something I didn' again Billie told me to ignore what Constance had said. As I closed the entrance to the attic and began to walk to find Violet's room, I felt a punch in the stomach. Something was wrong in the house and it was coming from the basement. I was a ghost after all, so I managed to vanish from everyone and go all the way back down to the main floor. I felt a great discomfort, something inside me began to boil. It was similar to the anger that I had when I found out Jack had killed Jason. It wasn't pain anymore. I walked down the steps with every move I got angrier. I was quiet but all I heard was confrontation. It was Constance, she was getting mad at Tate.

"Tell me you did not crawl on top of that man's wife!" She said as she held Tate's face in her hands. She got no response from Tate. She turned away and he began to speak:

"Mom.. mom you can't tell Violet, okay please don't-" He was cut off by Constance hitting him! I couldn't just stand here and watch this. It only reminded me of my father and how he would beat Jason. It made me furious.

"Constance!" I screamed as I walked towards where they were. It broke my heart to see Tate cry, after 16 years I still hate it when he cries.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" I got closer to her face as she put her hand over he mouth.

"Carol, go back upstairs, you don't need to know anything." She said.

"It's Carolyn and it doesn't matter if I don't need to know why you're hurting him!" My temper was flaring.

"Carolyn, if you knew about the terrible things he has done," She hits him once more. "You would be doing the same."

"Tate may have done something terrible, that doesn't make him a terrible person." I looked at his teary eyes, those beautiful eyes. "He's your son, just because you're angry over what he's done gives you no right what so ever to hit him. Jason endured that same fate and look what happened to him. He's dead! Jason never forgave Jack. It's no wonder why Tate isn't close to you, I wouldn't be either. Don't you ever hit him again." I closed my eyes and breathed out, she walked off and left. I opened my eyes and turned to see Tate shaking on the ground. He had seen me, I went against my better judgement and bent down to his level. This wasn't the best way to see my best friend after 16 years but he needed someone right now.

"Carol?" He shook as he spoke.

"Don't cry Tate, I don't wanna see any pretty faces cry." I slowly put my hand on his face and wiped away the tears. He held my hand and closed his eyes as I did. He looked so vulnerable, so fragile. It was terrifying. I had always seen Tate as someone to hold on to.

"What are you doing here? Why do you look so young? You're alive aren't you?" I couldn't describe the look he gave to me when he said this. It was just too much. I didn't know how to tell my best friend, who wanted more than anything for me to be happy when I was alive, that I was dead. This implies him knowing that I would never be somebody, I would never get married or have kids or do what he wanted me to do. He wanted me to be happy and now here I am stuck, trapped in the in-between.

"Tate, calm down I'll answer that later, you-."

"Calm down, how can I calm down if you're dead!" He yelled as more tears fell from his face. He stood up now getting pushing me closer to the wall behind me.

"Tate, stop it. You were just hit by your mom and I know you're upset but-" It wouldn't work but I had to try.

"No! You're dead, how can you be dead! I told you not to do anything stupid!" He pushed me until I was up against the wall now. I felt that same darkness from Violet's room, but now it was in front of me.

"Tate I know you did but-" His interruptions were infuriating me.

"Stop it! Don't make up excuses! I asked you to do one thing and look what happened to you! Who the hell did this to you? Or did you let someone do this to you? Why the fuck didn't you listen to me!" His words were cutting in deep, he was just in a fragile state and all of a sudden he stood up with power like it came from no where. "How stupid could you have been to stay in that God damn house knowing Jack could've-"

"Jack didn't do this" It was like an explosion, yelling at Tate seemed unnatural but it had to be done. "You did this! You left me all alone Tate Langdon! I don't know what you did but you promised me you wouldn't do that! Jason was enough pain but look at you did. You're the cause of my death, this happened because of you! You left me all alone, drowning in pain. How could you? I needed you." At this point, tears were all over my face. Tate had a shocked and hurt look on his face. That look didn't last long because he began to shout again.

"What do you mean I left you? You left me, the minute you found out Jason was dead you had already left me! How the hell was do you think I felt, it wasn't just about you, I needed someone and the only person I had was mourning over her dead son!"

"Jason wasn't my son and you know that!"

"Well you sure acted like it, you never had anytime for anything except Jason!" Tate's words burned but I was not about to let him continue.

"If you've forgotten your time was dedicated to Jason too, why are you getting so angry over my responsibility? My mom was never there and Jack was always beating on him. Who the hell was he supposed to turn to?"

"That's just the damn point Carolyn Lockwood, you only had time for him, you never did anything but be a mom! You didn't even see what was in front of you!"

"And what was that? Because all I ever saw was reality! Did you ever notice that we all needed each other, I only acted like a mom because I was forced to and whatever I missed is gone now and you know what the sad part is? I saw it but never believed anything would come from it." I couldn't yell anymore, 16 years of not being able to see Tate and we end up fighting. Over something that didn't even matter, he had Violet.

"Carol." I felt him crouch down in front of me. I looked up at him but I couldn't hold back the tears still falling. How could he have been mad at me? He was the one who left me alone after he promised he' d be there for me.

"I'm so sorry Carol, I didn't-" He didn't finish because he took my hand that was wrapped around my leg and helped me stand up. He just looked at me and hugged me, all of a sudden. I didn't understand this, a minute ago he was yelling at me and now he's hugging me like he used to. What had happened to him?

"What's the matter with you? You never had a problem with me taking care of Jason before." I sniffled and continued; "You're different."

"I know I'm sorry but it's hard to see you like this, dead I mean." He held onto me tighter. "You were just so full of life and now you're here in a desolate waste land."

"Do you honestly think that I would've had anything waiting for me after high school?" I pulled away from him and looked in his eyes.

"Of course you did-" I stopped him there.

"No I didn't Tate, I would've graduated and left without getting into college or anything. I would have to get a job right off the bat. What about Jason, if he were still alive? Who knows how that would've gone?" I breathed a bit and continued; "I'm not saying it was better for me to die, but I had literally had nothing going for me." He looked to the floor, analyzing what I had said.

"I guess you're right, but that doesn't mean you should be stuck here... I missed you, you know that?" He smiled lightly. "How did you get here any how?"

"I'll tell you when we have more time but right now I need you to do me a favor." I said smiling lightly back. Before he could answer we heard a voice coming from the top of the stairs.

"Tate?"

Thanks for reading guys. Sorry for not posting in a while, I've had crazy writers block and a lot of other stuff came along. Hopefully I get more ideas. Reviews would be lovely. Once again thank you for reading loves 3


	7. Chapter 6: Kept and keeping secrets

**Chapter 6: Kept and keeping secrets**

**Mood music: Breathe Me - Sia or Never let me go - Florence + the machine**

**Enjoy :)**

"Tate?"

I turned to the stairs, I recognized the voice. Violet's foot steps were coming down slowly. I felt Tate grab my arms tightly as I turned to face him.

"Go hide somewhere, I'll be back soon." He hugged me quickly and ran over to the stairs. I didn't hesitate to find somewhere to hide. I turned a corner but stayed close to the wall just to hear a bit of what they were talking about. Knowing that Violet and Tate were talking, let alone together made me feel uneasy. I didn't like it. Even though I knew Violet was a good person and never threatened me in any way I just didn't like her right now.

"What's going on?" Violet asked as I heard her reach the bottom of the staircase.

"Oh nothing, I was just, you know it doesn't matter. Let's go to the attic." He said. I turned my head a little just to see what was happening. He took her hand and led her up the stairs. Just like that. Was I just supposed to stay down here? Had he forgotten he said he be back soon? Apparently so. I slumped down, not knowing what else to do, I began to hum a bit, a little tune.

"So I'm guessing that's not how you pictured it." I looked up to see a guy, around his mid 20's sitting back in a rocking chair with a cup of red wine in his hand. A smirk was painted on his face.

"Pictured what?" I asked still sitting in my slumped position. I was a little embarrassed about him hearing me hum but I brushed it off.

"Seeing him after what five or ten years?" He took a sip of his wine. The way he said _him _sounded like he wasn't too fond of Tate.

"Okay before we get into that, who are you?"

"I'm Chad Warwick, I lived here now I'm just stuck here with all this bad decor. Vivienne thinks it's looks 'nice', I think she could have gotten some better paint swatches." He took another sip from his wine and then looked back at me and continued. "Your little friend is part of that reason. Enough about me, what about you? I can sense a lot of drama from you."

Two things I was positive about Chad, he was gay and very sassy.

"Are you honestly that interested? Even if you were it's a quite a story." I looked away from him and pushed my legs up and wrapped my arms around them. I placed my head on my chin and just looked to the floor.

"Every love story is quite a story. Believe me, mine definitely was. Thank God it's over."

"What makes you think it's a love story? It's more like a tragedy than anything else." I said still not looking up from the floor.

"Every love story has a tragedy here and there, it wouldn't be a story if it didn't. You never know some good things might come out of those tragedies. You're young, well from my understanding, you still have a chance to get something good out of this place. You don't seem as bad as everyone here."

"Everyone? Who's everyone?" I looked up.

"You haven't met the other ghosts? Not one?" He cocked his eyebrow in disbelief. The smirk still plastered on his face.

"I only know that Tate and Beau are here, now I know you're here too. Who else could there be?" I thought about it but no one else came to mind.

"Well you met the new addition to the house yesterday. She's a friend of yours." His smirk turned into a grin. "Well I've got to get going and make sure no one's touched the baby's room." He got up and got close to where I was and stopped in his tracks.

"Sleeping helps a lot here. I can tell you that, take a breather Carol." Without another word he left.

Take a breather? Sounds easy. I began to just look at my surroundings, a book was sitting next to me. I began to read it without even wondering what it was about. Slowly I followed Chad's advice. I fell asleep...

"_Ladies and Gentlemen the ham." Constance said as she brought in the ham._

"_It's lovely to have Carolyn and Jason here for thanksgiving, don't you think kids?." She said as she sat down next to me, watching Tate, he was looking awfully perky._

"_I love having them here." Addie said smiling. I smiled back. _

"_What's going on?" I whispered to him._

"_You'll see, be patient." He winked back. _

"_Thanks for having us Mrs. Langdon." Jason said as he sat next to Addie, covering our conversation, with asking her about the two were thick as thieves back then. _

"_So, who wants to say grace?" She hadn't even looked around the room when Tate piped up. _

"_Oh mother may I?" I looked back at him, he smirked at me. _

_Constance looked a bit un-easy. Larry responded with: _

" _Well of course son, I was hoping you would choose to become apart of this family." _

_Tate took ahold of mine and Larry 's hands._

"_Dear God, thank you for the salty pig meat we are about to eat, and for the rest of this indigestible swill. And thank you for this charade of a family–my father ran away when I was only six, and if I had known any better, I would have joined him." Constance let go of me and slapped his hand. Even then it annoyed me whenever she hit him. Especially in front of others. _

"_And also because she's been trying to get back into this house since she lost it. Lord, a big thank you for blinding the asshole that's doing my mother, so that she can't see what everybody knows, she doesn't really love him."_

_I watched him the whole time trying to keep calm. _

"_Amen." Addie and Jason said at the same time. _

"_Jason." I said scolding him a bit. _

"_It's alright Carolyn." Constance said a bit annoyed as she looked at her son. _

"_Now Tate,I know you've had a tough time making the adjustment to the recent changes, moving back in here after the recent tragedy that my own family went through-." Tate cut Larry off_

"_They burned themselves alive, after you were cheating on your wife with Constance, Lawrence." _

_I looked to Jason, we were both a little worried about this scene that was playing out._

"_That was nobody's fault." Larry said quietly, itching the back of his neck. He continued. "Passion drove her to it one day you'll understand." He pointed at me then at Tate. "There are sacrifices you have to make in the name of love, on a lighter note, I have reserved tickets for everybody for saturday at our community theater for the opening night of Brigadoon." _

_It's amazing how he thinks he can just cover it up, his family's loss and this new game of creating a new one. _

"_I'm delighted to be debuting in the chorus, Carolyn and Jason, you two are invited as well." He smiled at both of us. We both gave him a very fake smile. _

"_Well I for one, will be there with bells on." Constance said as she drank her wine. _

"_Thank you darling for being so supportive and encouraging, you have allowed me to explore another face of myself." He said. Addie pipped up. _

"_Yay I love the theater." Tate got a cold expression on his face and slammed the table breaking the plate. Jason and I both jumped. _

"_No Addie! You're a smart girl you know he killed our brother!" _

"_Stop it!" Constance yelled. Sadly I was stuck in between the middle of the two. "Beau died in his slumber of natural causes, now you know he had a respiratory ailment. Your brother's in a better place now, he suffered with every breath that he took." _

"_He only suffered because of you!" Some tears were forming in his eyes. He took my hand and held it tight. _

"_Ha, you know Tate unlike your siblings, you were graced with so many gifts. How is it that you can't bring yourself to use them? Just a smile or a kind word could open the gates to heaven. God knows you only do that with your siblings, Jason and especially Carolyn" _

_My cheeks burned a bit after that last part. Tate wiped some tears that had fallen onto his nose. He looked back at her and smirked. _

"_No matter how much you want it, I will never be your perfect son." He stood up and pulled me out of my chair. I didn't ask him anything, I just went along with him. As we walked up the stairs his grip got tighter. _

"_Ow Tate, let go." I said, I couldn't help it. I knew he was angry but leaving a bruise on my hand was not an option. He didn't let go though. As we got in the room his grip loosened but still hurt. He kept dragging me along until he sat me on his bed, he sat next to me and looked at our hands and finally noticed the bruising forming on my hand. His eyes widened and let go. _

"_Care, I'm sorry." His eyes didn't leave my hand. I could tell some tears were forming. _

"_Tate don't worry about it." I looked back at him and massaged my hand. I took his face in my hands as soon as I could use one of them again. _

"_Can you just stay here, I know you need to go home with Jason and all but right now, could you just stay here with me?" I wiped off his tears and replied: _

_Of course I can." As soon as I said it, he wrapped his arms around me. No tears just silence. We sat there for who knows how long, I didn't mind. He let go and looked back at me. He eventually lied down with me. Both of us just wrapped in each others arms. _

"_Carol? Carol? Wake up." _

I opened my eyes slowly, there was Tate. His eyes filled with worry. Everything rushed back to me, how he left with Violet saying he'd be right back, it suddenly filled me with rage.

"Where've you been? You said you would be right back!" I yelled at him and stood up. I knew part of me wanted to be here for Tate but there was something greater I came here for. I needed to remind myself of it as much as I could.

"I went upstairs to distract Violet, I needed to." He got up as well looking confused and hurt by my sudden out burst. "We needed to talk remember?"

"Talk? Yes we do. I need you to tell me something Tate. You can't lie to me okay?" I cupped his face with both of my hands. I didn't know how to read him at this point, but I needed answers and one way or another, I was getting them.

"Carebear, you're scaring me. What's-" I cut him off and looked down, I couldn't handle him calling me by my nickname he gave me ages ago knowing he had someone else to care for like he cared for me.

"Tate, the day Jason died you told me Jack took his body somewhere else. Now that I'm back, Constance has been giving me hints that Jason is here. I need you to tell me know. Is Jason here or not?"

I looked up at him, tears were on the brink of falling. I still couldn't see those beautiful eyes in pain. It made me begin to tear up as well. He didn't answer, he kept his mouth shut.

"Tate! Tell me! Please!" I cried harder as I yelled at him. It's like he wouldn't move, he wasn't budging. Until in one swift move he got loose from my hands and grabbed them instead.

"If I tell you, you could go away forever!" He yelled at me as well. I shook my head and began to speak.

"Tate, that doesn't mat-"

'Yes it does! I can't loose you! You can't leave me here alone! Now that I know you're here you just can't leave me." He yelled back.

"You aren't alone! You have Violet! She cares for you more than I ever could! I won't be leaving, I'm staying and if anyone deserves to not be alone, it's me! If Jason is here, I need to know so I don't spend the rest of eternity crying over your relationship with Violet, alone!" My eyes widened, I basically just told him that I, was jealous about Violet.

"If you're not going to help me, I'll do it myself!" I turned around and began to shout.

"Jason! Come out! It's me Carol! I'm here!" I shouted these phrases as I walked all over the house, Tate was behind me telling me to quiet down. The more he did, the louder I shouted. As we got to the third floor, where the bedrooms were, Tate turned me around and kept a hold of me.

"Carol, I can tell you everything but you need to listen to me! You can't just walk away from me this time!" I stayed quiet as we stood in the hallway. "The day Jason died, your dad didn't take his body away. He just left, I couldn't leave him in the living room like that. I took him here while he was barely alive and let him die on the property. I knew if he died here, he wouldn't be gone forever. I couldn't lose him like that."

At that moment, all I could do was stare at him with tears in my eyes. I regained my voice and asked. "Well if he's here, where is he? He's died here then he must be around the house like you are!"

"I haven't seen him, ever. He's never around Care." He replied.

"What do you mean he's never around, he has to be-" I was cut off by the sound of a guitar strumming. I stopped my breathing -if that's what I could call it- and listened. I turned and slowly, with Tate behind me also curious about the sound, walked to where the sound was coming from. With each step I took, I felt warm and free. I reached the end of the hall and found a small room with the door open but barely. Enough to stare through it. I couldn't believe my eyes and ears.

**Thank you for reading lovelies! I hope you're excited to the next chapter, I am! I'm just telling you now, that the songs I use for Carolyn or Jason in the story, like when they sing are from recent times, just don't think of them like that. Think of them like their souls speaking. Anchor for example by Mindy Gledhill, when Carolyn sings it, the song portrays her telling Jason that anything could happen but she'd always be there to keep him calm and okay. I'm just asking that so on the next chapter I don't get as much hate. Any questions? Feel free to send me a pm or write a review! I will happily answer it. Thank you once again, and I'll talk to you at the end of the next chapter. Love you all.**


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